Epicurus on the Value of Friends #026

Hello, and welcome back to Every Dawn, where every morning we get a thought to accompany us throughout the day. Today, I'm still reading Epicurus, and I found this sentence, which I will read to you. He says, "Of all the means which are procured by wisdom to ensure happiness throughout the whole of life, by far the most important is the acquisition of friends." So, of all the different ways we have to make our lives happy, the most important are friends.

This is something that we often forget. We often take friendships for granted. We often think that our friends will be there forever just because they are friends now, and there are so many other things to do that are perhaps more exciting than our friends. Perhaps there is a new promotion in my job where I have to work longer, and this means I cannot meet my friend, but it's worth it because I will be promoted, and then I will have a better job, I will have more money, and I will have a bigger house.

Or perhaps I have multiple friends, and some are cooler than others, so I tend to stick with those that are, you know, socially more accepted, more cool, more desirable, and I neglect other friends. Or perhaps I think that I don't need any friends because I'm so great. I can do everything myself. I'm, you know, I'm a prepper, I'm the one or the other thing, whatever makes me feel superior. And so I think only weak people need friends. I don't need any friends.

But there comes a time in life where we need friends. I used to live alone for a very long time, many years, and I thought it was okay. I could live alone perfectly well, but then I became ill with my back. I had suddenly back pain. I couldn't walk, I couldn't even move through my apartment, I couldn't even move to the phone. I was lying on the floor, you know, screaming because of the pain in my back. Some nerve had been caught there somewhere, and, you know, at this moment, I realized how important it can be to have friends, how important it is to be able to call someone for help, and not only the national, you know, health system or whatever the next hospital or emergency number is, but somebody who really cares about you.

And many of us will make this experience when we grow older. When you are 60, and you realize that it's not so easy anymore to have friends, and perhaps you missed the opportunity to keep the friends you had when you were younger because these are now gone. You didn't contact them for 10 years, 20 years. They are gone. They have their own families. They have other friends, and so now you are alone, and you are old and alone, and there's nobody there to be with you, to share this experience with you.

So, we should always keep this in mind that nobody can flourish alone, like Aristotle would say. Nobody can alone master life and be happy. We can try to live alone as hermits, but according to Aristotle and Epicurus, it's not going to make us happy. Happiness comes from having friends, from sharing our lives, from also having the practical support of our friends who can help us in times of need, and we can help them, and so we can all together be happy.

So, perhaps think of an old friend today when you go out, somebody you have not spoken to for a long time, but somebody perhaps you always liked in the past. Then give them a call. Try to see how they are, if they want to meet you, if you want to go have a coffee somewhere together, and perhaps you can revive the friendship and give it a new life and make your life a little more happy. Thank you, thank you, and see you tomorrow. Bye-bye.